I had a 2 years long break that lasted until the beginning of this year. I had all these wonderful stories inside me, and no time to write them. Or so I thougth. Truth is, I was finding excuses.

Lack of inspiration. Lack of time. Children. Seeing friends. Then moving to a new city, then moving to a new house. I was – and am – a master in excuses, and I knew it even at the time.

Everything changed one day when I asked myself: “Why am I finding excuses for not writing?”. I mean, pretty much nobody even knew that I wrote. I could just “not write”, it wasn’t a doctor’s prescription. 

Point is, I realised, I like to write and I want to write so much, that I knew I wanted people to read my stories, eventually. I wanted – and still want! – to convey feelings: pretty impossible if no one reads you, uh?

In the end, I found out that what was blocking me was only fear: fear to complete something and fear to be evaluated for it.

The thought of finishing a story, because once it’s finished, it becomes static. But even once finished, it’ll still never be perfect, and I know it. I’d like to go back and rewrite every single one of my stories! Even now.

And then, definitely, the thought of being judged. But then again, nobody will ever understand what you do. Each mind is different, each word written or read, each note played and heard may have a different meaning for everyone.

I remembered what was my approach before playing solist in the orchestra, with the fear bulding up, all the doubts grippin your breath. To calm down, I used to think that I do it for myself. It wasn’t a lie, I wasn’t pretending: I did play for myself as I write, mainly, for myself. And even if my objectice is conveying feelings to my readers, I must always be aware of the fact that nobody will ever fully understand how much effort I put into my art, reading my book or listening to a Mozart Concert. No one, but you, will know the years of studying, the nights up writing, the fear, the tears and the fatigue.

So be proud, and start writing again! That’s your art, for the world.

Restart writing little by little

So when you come back after realisimg that, I suggest you write something (500-1000 words) completely new. Mainly because your style may be very different by then: experiences change you in more ways than you think.

Have it edited: you can find very helpful people on twitter and facebook. THere are hundreds of writing groups there.

Then, once finished, post it for free on some website (there are a lot, depending on your genre, and a facebook group is still a suitable option. Crave for feedbacks: you need them!

If they are all bad… you may reconsider writing. That should not be the case, thiugh, because if you like writing that much… you’ll reach the heart of someone for sure.

So, it works. You still have it! Write again, do it for yourself and then, only then, share it with the others.

The world will be here, waiting.